Trepanning is a barbaric form of medical treatment from the Middle Ages. Intended to cure mental illness, migraines, epilepsy, and other brain ailments, some patients survived the so-called cure. The procedure entailed drilling into the side of the patient’s skull, without anesthesia, to expose the outer membrane of the brain.
As the oldest form of surgery known, predating the Medievalists by thousands of years, it was thought to relieve pressure in the brain so that “the humors and air may go out and evaporate.” Yeah. We guess, when you’re working with next to no concrete knowledge of how the human body works, this wasn’t such a leap.
Medievalists Had A Cure for Baldness
Good news, right? Here’s the cure: “Take bear fat [i.e. kill a bear without a pistol], a small number of ashes from wheat straw or from winter wheat straw, mix this together and anoint the entire head with it.” This is according to the 12th-century scholar Hildegard. Another treatment included mixing chicken or pigeon droppings with ashes and lye and rubbing it on the bald spot.
In the Middle Ages, though vanity, as today, preferred a nice head of hair, a wide bald spot did represent virility, as long as the man grew a thick beard. A man without a dense beard, but chocked with abundance on top, was considered weak.
Bloodletting: The Cure-All
Be thankful that modern doctors won’t try to cure your illness by attaching blood-sucking leeches to your flesh. Besides applying leeches or worms to draw blood from the patient, opening a vein directly with an incision to alleviate excess blood in the body was also practiced in the Medieval period.
If these methods failed, physicians might try charms, totems, or amulets, which make sense when you know that the Christian church believed sin was responsible for diseases. Still, 'sense' is a stretch. This practice lasted centuries after the Middle Ages, and it was even the cause of death for President George Washington.
His Royal Throne
The king’s padded potty was tended by a loyal servant. Known as “The Groom of the King’s Stool,” the coveted position required moving the throne from place to place so it could be at the king’s constant disposal. Duties also included wiping the royal bum whenever the king relieved himself. Towels, water, and a washbowl were at hand.
The keeper of the Stool was one of the king’s closest confidants, highly compensated, and usually a son of noblemen. His duties often led to higher positions. The bedazzled porta-potty was invented for King Henry VIII and wasn’t abolished until 1901 by King Edward VII.
The Canopy Bed was Invented in the Middle Ages
The first canopy beds were suspended from the ceiling, with the canopy and drapes covering and surrounding a bed for privacy and warmth. In the 15th century, four-post beds were coveted and the curtains, sometimes embroidered of fine heavy cloths, were very expensive. We know they were valuable because wealthy landowners often included these beds in their wills.
Since roofs were thatched in these days, it is assumed that canopy beds served an additional purpose which was to protect the sleeper from droppings from the ceilings, ranging from water to pest excrement. It was a useful invention, no doubt, and nowadays we can enjoy canopy beds for the aesthetic, and thankfully not the practical use.